You People Make Me Sick

The end of the month is upon us, and the votes have been counted and verified. The number of CRAM anagrams received is....

0.

Shame on you people! Not one of you entered the CRAM competition and as a result no-one has won the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for an all expenses paid trip to Bearsden. Are you mad?

Anyway, it's fair enough as CRAM isn't for another 8 months anyway. This was just a dry run for the real thing.

Even then, I'm still so offended by the lack of entries that I'm going to stop the Craig George Renton fan club for good. In fact, I ripped the last poster off my wall this morning!

CROONER, GET RAIN EGG.

Normal Service Resumed

Last night I saw Memento, starring Guy Pearce and that girl form The Matrix. Pearce plays Leonard Shelby, a man whose wife was brutally raped and murdered. Up until the incident he can remember everything, but since then, he suffers from short-term memory loss and cannot form new memories. He is hell-bent on finding the killer and avenging his wife. In order to remember what happened before, or who he met etc, he either takes photos of things, writes information down or tattoos essential facts onto his body.

The film begins as Shelby gets his revenge, then each consecutive scene is actually the one before the current one, and hence the film retraces the steps leading to what happens at the end There is a brilliant twist at the end (which is actually the beginning, if that makes any sense).

Memento is very clever and thought-provoking, and I strongly urge you to see it - Excellent stuff.

Rating: 9/10.

Birdseye Unplugged

I went to see Captain Birdseye in concert at the SECC, the other night. He did a solo acoustic set, mainly performing old sea shanties. The most moving of his songs was, I think, the one where he told the story of being stranded on a desert island with nothing but fish fingers.

Emotional stuff indeed.

Did You Know...

Seeing as C.R.A.M. (Craig Renton Appreciation Month) is almost upon us, I'm going to give you the opportunity to win a fantastic prize. First of all, some theory...

As you know, most words have one or more anagrams. If you take "Craig George Renton", this can be rearranged to give "greet congo earring", or "Get Green Oar Co.". The best I can muster is "Error! Can't get going!". Your challenge is to come up with the best anagram of "Craig George Renton". The best one submitted by the end of February wins a prize. If you're lucky you might even get to meet the man voted "Best Enigma - ESE 2004", in person. Go on - give it a go!!

I've always been a firm believer in using time spent on the train productively.

P.S. No it's not clever - admittedly quite sad.

Optimistic As Ever

2 months of unemployment +
4 months 12-hour call centre shifts +
2 months of unemployment +
9 weeks commuting hell =

10 MONTHS OF SHIT.

frustration++
moan++
hope++

There were roughly 6 weeks in all, where I was training in call centres, during which life was actually enjoyable to an extent.

Optimists will call it character-building - I call it 10 months of shit.

Mentally Suspect

To the tune of Suspicious Minds (Elvis):

I'm caught in a trap,
I can't walk out,
Because I work in East Kilbride

Oh why can't you see,
What it's doing to me,
When this 3 hour journey wont subsiiiide

This can't go on forever,
Scotrail, SPT-eee,
And I can't build my dreams,
When "First" make profit off meeee

So if an old friend I know,
Stops by to say hello,
He would realise I was exhauuusted

From all ths travellin',
All the zones I been in,
Even when the weather's dark and frosty

This can't go on forever,
Unless I find a new home,
I could just leave my job,
But then I'd be fuckin' skint, wouldn't I?

I've Been Tired

The past few weeks have been exhausting, but I've been getting used to the working, sleeping and travelling. Hopefully the latter won't matter for much longer, as I may be on the verge of finding new accomodation, which would no longer mean commuting 3 hours per day. Whew!

C.G.R. (Pentium 4).

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